Doctor Sheehan reports that his role is to provide a space of comfortable discussion of what I prefer when I am ready. He is of the opinion that if I understand myself better, I will gain clarity.
He asked me how I believed the ship would generally react to the alarms I set and whether it worked as planned. He stated that graduation should not be my goal or I would never achieve it.
He defined progress in upcoming sessions as small incremental changes that would make my life here more meaningful or manageable. He asked me to define progress in these areas to him.
He expressed that the purpose of these questions was to establish rapport. That if no rapport was established, we would end the sessions entirely.
He discussed his background as an army lieutenant who became interested in treating the criminally insane through art therapy. He says I am neither but that his skills with this subset will assist in accessing feelings in healthy ways.
You have assigned me a task with a penalty attached to it. I have no desire to experience that penalty. Therefore I will take the first option and my opinion ends there.
My answer is that I will obey you and Doctor Sheehan. I will work to be a consummate inmate and patient and give you no reason to enact further punishment.
[The last few weeks have seen Thrawn barely move from his cabin/office. He ventures out to take late night showers, to eat, to clock in at Maintenance, and then return.
He is in his office now when Florian comes searching]
[Normally prompt with answering - especially given the proximity alarm his door is equipped with - Thrawn does not answer in his usual speediness.
When he does, it's only because the proximity alert needed to chime twice to shake him from his thoughts. He rises, walking to the door on autopilot, and opens it to his warden.
His eyes are dull and muted, face wan and a paler blue than usual. There is a thinness in his frame where his clothing doesn't quite fit. Whatever sharp intelligence is quieted now, in place of a more anesthetized version. He doesn't move to admit Florian inside, speaking to him from the doorway]
I will not be of much use in a conversation at this time.
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He asked me how I believed the ship would generally react to the alarms I set and whether it worked as planned. He stated that graduation should not be my goal or I would never achieve it.
He defined progress in upcoming sessions as small incremental changes that would make my life here more meaningful or manageable. He asked me to define progress in these areas to him.
He expressed that the purpose of these questions was to establish rapport. That if no rapport was established, we would end the sessions entirely.
He discussed his background as an army lieutenant who became interested in treating the criminally insane through art therapy. He says I am neither but that his skills with this subset will assist in accessing feelings in healthy ways.
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I do not think. I will abide and obey.
Have I done something else that needs correction?
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All the things I've asked and you pretend I don't want to hear.
I never thought you cruel. So now I have to figure out if you mean to be cruel or somehow can't add two and two to make four.
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When you decide, please inform me so I know which to apologize for.
[he hangs up]
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He is in his office now when Florian comes searching]
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When he does, it's only because the proximity alert needed to chime twice to shake him from his thoughts. He rises, walking to the door on autopilot, and opens it to his warden.
His eyes are dull and muted, face wan and a paler blue than usual. There is a thinness in his frame where his clothing doesn't quite fit. Whatever sharp intelligence is quieted now, in place of a more anesthetized version. He doesn't move to admit Florian inside, speaking to him from the doorway]
I will not be of much use in a conversation at this time.
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